Most of us who live in urban centers find ourselves united on key points of day-to-day life. For instance, many of us greet each day with the same howl: "Why, oh why, has God provided us with no easy way to eat pizza on the go?"
Because slices obviously aren't portable enough. You get a cheesy triangle served up on a cheap paper plate, and then what do you do with it? Fold it in half and walk? Bah! There may be uneven pavement outside! There may be crosswalks! There may be errant cats. Clearly, to take this pizza slice outdoors is to court danger. No, the only sensible response to a slice of pizza in hand is to curl up on the pizzeria floor and wait for the firm hand of death.
If these thoughts have left you in despair, don't worry. There is a visionary among us. Ladies and gentlemen, behold the pizza cone.
Now, the cynics among you might ask: "Isn't it ridiculous to put pizza in an ice-cream cone?" Dudley Doworries will warble, from beneath their beds, "Won't that thing be volcanically hot, and render third-degree grease burns to anyone who bites into it?" Quincy Queenybottoms will surely cry, "Isn't the crust-to-cheese ratio completely destroyed here?"
All of which I answer by saying: Yes.